Seven Things to Know about Argentina

1. Helado + pan + pasta = panca. Some Argentine helado rivals Italian gelato, and ice cream shops are everywhere. Pan (bread) is regularly served with meals, and the bakeries/pastry shops are quite good. And, as we know, there is no shortage of things Italian in Argentina which explains the prevalence of pasta. What does it all add up to? Panca. (At least that’s how I think it’s spelled.) It’s from the word “pan” and it means fat, pudgy, doughy, pleasantly plump. Yes, it’s safe to assume that the leading causes of big butts in Argentina are: Ice cream, bread and pasta, Yum!

2. Big butts = big toilet seats. The toilet in my apartment in BsAs was designed for something a little wider than I have to offer. Maybe it’s time to visit more of those ice cream shops, bakeries and Italian restaurants.

 3. Public primping is encouraged. The mirrors in men’s restrooms are big. This is useful because men spend a lot of time fixing their hair. And I’m willing to bet they spend more money on hair products than women. Both men and women can be found checking themselves out in large reflective windows while reinforcing the reputation Argentineans have for being good-looking and very appearance-conscious.

4. Argentina is a Catholic country with easy access to condoms. If you need a condom, stop in at the men’s room in a mall or in a hotel. Besides, vending machines are much more convenient than standing in line at the pharmacy. Does this mean that all of the primping and hair-product pays off?

5. Bring your own change.  Automated teller machines seem to only dispense large bills, yet businesses always ask if you have something smaller. It’s not uncommon to see signs that say “No 50s or 100s accepted.” To be clear, 50 Argentine pesos is about $12US. And, Argentina is no longer cheap – it’s just that no one has change. It’s the responsibility of the customer to arrive with the proper bills and change. Once when I was at a supermarket, the cashier didn’t have proper change, so she rounded-up and gave me back a few extra centavos. But best of all was when I was getting a bite to eat at the end of my day at Iguazú Falls. The cashier did not have enough coins, so she gave me some gum to make up the difference. I wonder if the vending machines at the mall take gum?

6. Buenos Aires is sometimes called the Paris of South America. Typically it’s a reference to the architecture, but I can’t help wondering if maybe it’s a reference to their love for dogs – and what they leave behind.

Actually, I think Parisians are now much better at poop-scooping. Okay, there may even be a couple horses contributing to the problem.

7.  It’s chau, not adios. I haven’t heard anyone say “adios” in Argentina. I suppose if they did, it would be “a-Dee-oth” which I might not even recognize.

Ciao for now. Or rather “chau por el momento.”